Archive for December 2012

Hold Fast

In the past few weeks, I have received many more emails from women (no men yet) who are facing what seems like impossible situations with the father of their child/children.  Given what has happened to Prince, it has been hard for me to find the words to advise others who find themselves in similarly horrifying…

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Surrounded by people – but still alone

It’s Christmas Eve tonight.  One year ago, this very moment, I was tucking my son into bed and preparing to wrap his presents for his first Christmas.  Looking back, I am glad that I was unaware of how bad things would get.  I was able to celebrate my son’s first Christmas like he would have…

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The honor our children deserve

Each day, I think about the things I could have done to prevent my son from dying.  Regardless of how many people tell me the absurdity of this exercise, it is something that every parent who has lost a child (especially in this way) will do.  While I am smart enough to realize how my…

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My son’s unmarked grave

  Today I went to my son’s grave for the first time since I buried him.  I don’t know what I was expecting to feel, but I certainly wasn’t prepared for what I experienced.  As I stepped out of the car and walked toward the unmarked grave, my heart sank and I was brought back…

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The Lost Child Club

This post is dedicated to the parents who lost their babies in Newtown, Connecticut today.  18 babies died in their classroom at Sandy Hook Elementary School when a gunman deliberately came into their classroom and murdered these innocent children. Rest in peace baby boys and baby girls.  My Prince is waiting for you in heaven…

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Screaming at the top of my lungs

Today I spent most of my day on a plane traveling.  Looking out at the clouds, my thoughts were a reflection of how my mind is racing in a million directions.  I wondered how my son was doing in heaven, if he was mad at me for not fighting hard enough to protect him, whether…

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Prince’s Lessons – The important things in life

Prince always helped me put things into perspective.  He went through life holding onto important people and enjoying all of the new things he was learning.  He was independent (or tried to be when I would let him), intelligent, and happy.  He reminded me of a little old man trapped in a toddler’s body.  Here are some of…

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Surviving My Way

This week I feel like my body is crashing.  My mind is racing all the time, and I cannot look at anything without thinking about Prince – and wishing he could be with me continuing to experience life.  Many people have asked how I have been surviving – how I can get out of bed…

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Every Single Day – and for the rest of my life…

The Associated Press came out with an article involving my son’s case this morning.  Several news outlets appeared to have picked it up within minutes of it being posted.  It appears that the story has gone national.  When I read the article, I actually felt like it was Christmas and my birthday at one time.…

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Pain is Pain: Not Worse – Not Better…Just Different

Today I went to brunch with an old friend/coworker.  We hadn’t seen each other in years so this is the first time she has seen me “post relationship with a psychopath”.  She had worked with me when I used to be a teacher, so she knew how passionate I have always been about advocating for…

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